The Wedding Thrashers

Its been a long wedding season this quarter, starting from early November right until 1st week of February and attending a lot of weddings has brought a certain type of behavior amongst the attendees to my notice; I call them the ‘Wedding Thrashers’. Sounds similar to Wedding Crashers?? Well I believe the former are worse than the latter ones.

So who exactly are these ‘Wedding Thrashers’? Well it could be anyone around you who’s attending the wedding; it could be your friends, family members, I discovered that even my own sister is an expert WT! I used to be one too until I realized my mistake.

I think we all will agree that lots of weddings are attended for the sake of formalities and one keeps hearing “Aare ghar pe khana nahi banaya tha…isliye aa gaya”, “Doesn’t look nice if we don’t attend”, “I just got this new dress and wanted to wear it for some event and this wedding came up!” and a million other bahanas for having to attend a wedding as an obligation. And these are the perfect set of people who turn into Wedding Thrashers and don’t even realize they are at it!

“I think the bride’s nose is too big” Giggles Giggles Laughter

WT 1 : “I don’t understand why everyone has to have their wedding in XYZ Hall/Hotel. I am sick and tired of eating here”
WT 2 : “ I know yaar, I think I have started recognizing some of the staff around here too!!”

WT female 1 : “What kind of make-up is that!!! My hair looks better when I get out of bed in the morning”
WT female 2 : “Totally, it looks like an eagles nest, and did you see how evil looking her mom-in-law is! God save the girl”

WT male “Saale ka matka lag gaya hai!!” grinning at the groom while saying this.

If you have ever heard these conversations around you in weddings then you have experienced Wedding Thrashers, and if you have been part of these conversations, then you are a WT yourself!!

Why am I making so much fuss about casual comments passed during a wedding you may ask? Well the point is that 2 individuals and their families are tying a knot after having taken one of the most important decisions of their life and want to share their joy with you by wanting you to be a part of that memorable event. They must have spent endless nights trying to arrange things for their guests, not to mention the amount of $$$ spent that keeps the F&B industry in business. After all that pyaar and pain what WT’s do is simply walk into the wedding hall and be critical about anything that doesn’t look right to them. Well ofcourse there will be goof ups, the couple might not be Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, the food might be a little too oily for your liking, but all these cosmetic details of the wedding shouldn’t distract you from the main purpose of being at that wedding, which is to congratulate, support and shower blessings and good wishes to those who thought that your presence mattered that day!

This is no movie or restaurant to play critic about the poor direction, make-up, acting, ambience, food or service! Think beyond that, take a look at the close relatives of those party to the wedding; look at the alacrity with which they welcome you, the happiness on their face, their warm hospitality and then the event will look much bigger than trivial things like sabzi was too teekha and poor decoration. Sometimes in life, one needs to have a selfless approach towards things, and most of us do have it but lose our way because we forget the real reason behind the action, WT’s are guilty of this, and the sooner they mend their ways, the better it will be for everyone to enjoy the real pleasure of the event.

Elephants of Indian Cricket!

The recent decision taken by the Indian cricket selection board to go into a big Australian series with a young team is definitely a brave one! But this article is not about applauding or criticizing that decision. Its to draw analogy with a documentary which I saw on National Geographic some years ago...(well yea...so I am a little geeky on occasions and I do enjoy watching NGC and Discovery!!)

The film was about a new wildlife reserve being set up somewhere in Africa. So animals were procured from already established wildlife reserves from various parts of Africa, to be introduced into the park. There were giraffes, wild beasts and packs of other animals including a young herd of Elephants. The specialty of this herd was that was that this group was entire consisting of young male and female elephants and no elders, since it was difficult to transport old elephants plus it was difficult for them to adjust to a new environment.

Everything was going well in the park, with the animals adjusting themselves in their new home, but soon a very bizarre occurrence came into light. The young male elephants in the park started getting very aggressive; uprooting trees and causing damage to property and life. A team was flown in to study this sudden destructive behavior that developed amongst the young males. The team noted that not only had the herd become more violent, they had also started mating way before the average mating age in elephants. Their eating patterns and lifestyle were studied intensive and no particular reason could be concluded for this aggression until someone pointed out that it could be the absence of older males in the pack which could be leading to this wreckage. This was noted and three mature male elephants were introduced in the pack as no alternate solutions could be thought of. And indeed it worked; 1 month after introduction of the new elephants, the violence went down and gradually it disappeared.

The explanation given to this entire episode was that the young elephants did not have any guidance or role models to replicate or follow initially and hence went on a rampage showcasing their power and might without any fears. With the introduction of elders in the herd, there was a sense of fear and at the same time an example was set in terms of behavior.

Whats the relevence of this with the Indian cricket team? - you may ask. Well, the situation of the new Indian team is quite similiar as that wildlife park; Dravid & Saurav have been dropped from the Indian team, Kumble and Laxman returned after the Test series, and this leaves a whole crop of young boys in the dressing room barring Sachin and Gary Kirsten. There is no doubt that these young boys are like the young elephants of the jungle. The have great potential and talent, and the onus lies on them to take Indian cricket forward; but in the absence of senior pros in the team, it might become difficult for the players to handle sudden fame and media attention. From Yuvraj, Harbhajan and Sreesanth's recent on and off-field behavior its clear that they aren’t the best examples of well behaved gentleman, with Yuvraj swearing and abusing on the field quite frequently during the recently held 20-20 championship.

That is where I believe there is a need for a few senior players to spend time with the boys, not only for technical assistance but also to teach these guys how to live in the media spotlight and not get carried away with the money and adulations causing permanent damage to themselves and Indian cricket like those young Elephants did to the park. But I hope that humans are different from Elephants, and even if there are no seniors in the team, they shall but their best effort in terms of performance as well as demeanor and act as perfect ambassadors on the game.